Actress Apocalypse

By Gary M. Lumpp • Feb 18th, 2005 • Category: Comedy

If there’s a kind of film that could use a little mocking, it’s the backyard microbudget epic. While Richard R. Anasky’s Actress Apocalypse barely gets past making fun of the auditioning process, it’s still an amusing look behind the scenes at what more than a few of us can relate to.

Apocalypse follows the trials and tribulations of director David B. Lincoln III (Garo Nigoghossian), a guy so professional that he makes sure to wear a suit while shooting in his family’s shed out back. He’s on a quest to shoot his epic masterpiece Clearwater Canyon, a movie that has something to do with women being stalked and killed by a “big gay Indian.” Ed Wood would be so proud. However things don’t go well the first day of shooting when none of the actors (who all insist they’ll do everything to be a part of the project) actually show up, and it’s back to the drawing board.

The only people who stick with David are his potentially psychotic, Jim Morrison-influenced brother Vance (Greg G. Freeman) and a guy nicknamed “The Golden Terror” (Jay Ingle) who, while not good enough to be cast as an actor, is given the job of boom operator (and he’s even worse at that). Rounding out the production is the cameraman, who is supposed to be shooting the feature but ends up being a documentarian.

The rest of Apocalypse captures a disastrous first day of actual production (the actress’s breakdown is hysterical, and all too familiar) and the subsequent auditions to recast the lead role. This is where Vance steps in. At first he wants to scrap the script entirely (in favor of a gay zombie epic), but then he focuses his attention on auditioning the bevy of beauties that are all too happy to doff their clothing for a shot at the lead.

Actress Apocalypse is a surprisingly funny mockumentary, with a first half that’s packed with laughs and a wittiness that’s lost on quite a few other comedies at this level. The mostly-improvised acting is decent and actually lends a bit to the humorous situations, and it’s just cartoonish enough that it works. At the halfway point the movie changes its tone just a bit (it’s an Apocalypse for a reason), and unfortunately it never reclaims the hilarity of the first 45 minutes. The storyline is one we can all relate too – it’s a shame though that it’s just not quite enough to support the hour and a half running time, and it could benefit from some trimming of the more redundant elements.

There are two fantastic reasons to watch this picture. First off, the editing is simply some of the best I’ve seen at this level. Anasky is influenced by the mondo pics of the 60’s and it shows, from the (over)use of the fish eye lens to the green gels and psychedelic montages. There are several sequences here that would feel right at home on MTV, and the transitions between scenes are done with an expert hand. While the bumpers do get a little monotonous near the end, and some of the montages go on a bit long (one feels more like a full-fledged music video than a part of the movie), it’s still some great work.

The other element would be the female cast members. If you’re not into nudity, skip this movie. However, if you do enjoy seeing incredibly attractive young women removing their clothing at the drop of hat, then this is a must-see. That might be the only thing that doesn’t ring true when it comes to mocking microbudget epics – I can’t think of any that had women this attractive getting naked. Unfortunately they aren’t asked to act much, but Lily Walker does a good job considering what she’s given.

The technical side is a bit more difficult to speak to. I was given a pre-release screener (timecode still included), so it’s hard to say if the sound levels being off at times is something that will be fixed or is supposed to be a part of the movie’s charm. Either way it’s not too distracting and is solid for the most part. Since it’s a mockumentary the camerawork is mostly handheld and done pretty well, but this isn’t the kind of movie that’s going to feature dolly work or crane shots. The music fits right in with everything on the screen, and it’s some of the most creative use of b-roll I’ve seen in a while.

Of course one of the better jokes in this movie is that while it makes fun of the backyard SOV epics created single-handedly by a determined filmmaker, Richard R. Anasky’s name appears around two dozen times in the closing credits. Takes one to know one, and I say that with pride having been there myself.

If you’ve ever shot a flick in a bathroom “because it’s the only room available,” then Actress Apocalypse is definitely worth watching.

Share and Enjoy: These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web pages.